Way Beyond "Anger Management"

What is Nonviolence?

The term "nonviolent" as we use it in Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is more than "not being physically violent". Nonviolence represents a way of being conscious with the accompanying intent in thought, word, and action. The two terms that are most related are the Sanskrit, "ahimsa", which means "harmlessness" and "satyagraha" which translates as "the force of truth". So the spirit of nonviolence means that when I am in contact with any life form, my message to that life, in thought, word, and action is, "I will not harm you. I will not violate the integrity of your being."

I am guided by my awareness of the force of truth, because I sense in the depth of my being that all human beings are only trying to fulfill life-giving, universal values and needs. When I see that, I know that when I hear any form of communication, no matter how hostile, critical, or judgmental it seems, that it is an attempt to express unmet needs, values, and desires. This awareness stimulates compassion, which I see as a prerequisite to and a result of nonviolent communication.

Compassion and nonviolence are not the same, but intimately related processes in deeply and authentically connecting. Nonviolent Communication offers a spirit and powerful tool for inspiring compassionate connections with oneself and others.

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I regret I do not know the author of this piece. If you know, I did not write this, please tell me and I will credit that person.

Depth NVC

I recently participated in a Nonviolent Communication training in Columbus, Ohio that included Robert Gonzales as one of the trainers. I feel deep gratitude to Robert for advancing the field of NVC, in my view, through his work with the Beauty of Needs and working with Core Jackal Beliefs.

The term that came to me when reflecting on Robert's teachings is "Depth Psychology," and I regard his training as, "Depth Nonviolent Communication." More than repetition of NVC skills, and even more than discovering more effective ways to share NVC with others, Robert is taking the process of NVC and using it for deep healing and transformation that goes deeper than any other NVC experiences I have ever seen.

Robert lives in Prescott, AZ, and trains with several other trainers through the NVC Training Institute.