Sunday, September 6, 2009

The Connecting Power of Authentic Expression

I continue to be amazed by the power of honest, caring self-expression.

I can hardly believe how empowering and energizing it was to express my honesty to a person in an NVC organization I am a part of, in front a group of 20 people, no less.

More than 24 hours later, I continue to feel jazzed.

Here's what happened: I was part of a daylong meeting, during which one of the participants and I had an exchange where we both experienced distress and dissatisfaction.

We completed our tasks early, and the facilitator of our meeting (a consultant) suggested that we spend the final hour practicing a new clearing process that I have been developing that combines things I've learned in the Mankind Project with NVC.

After doing some heavy-duty self-empathy -- and receiving empathy on a break from another participant -- I passionately expressed how I felt about the person's actions, along with the qualities in relationships that really matter to me (i.e. my needs).

We had a dialogue over the course of 5 or 10 minutes (again, in front of the group), and it was of secondary importance how the person responded and how it ended -- I had proactively expressed my truth to the person, with the rest of the group as my witness, and wow that feels great!